A Certain, Je ne sais wha..?

When I go into Patisserie Valerie for a coffee, I ask the staff for a, “café au lait”. I say that primarily because I want a coffee with milk – a ‘white coffee’ as we’re more accustomed to say in England. I don’t say it because I’m a ponce. And if I wasn’t in a place that styled itself, ‘a patisserie’ (French for Greggs innit), had a logo featuring a can-can dancer, sold croque monsieurs and displayed a bloody great basket of baguettes in the window, I wouldn’t sodding well say it at all. I’m decent enough to indulge their commercial conceit; I’m actually playing along with their, hon’-he-hon’ masquerade…. But having deliberately lured me into their faux Gallic environment with their artful cultural cues, how do their staff habitually greet my request for a, “café au lait”? I’ll tell you. They look at me like I’m fucking mad. Excuse my French.

Then I order a latte.

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3 Responses to A Certain, Je ne sais wha..?

  1. lol this is funny.You need to brush up on your french.Visiting from Blog club group G

  2. Sarah says:

    I have to admit I would probably be someone looking at you like a gormless so and so if you said it – however I blame my hatred for coffee and the fact look at anyone who wants one in such a way 😉

  3. Surely if you visit enough and say it a few times, they’ll eventually cotton on, and even if they still don’t know what you’re saying, they’ll at least recognise you and know “that’s the guy for the latte”….

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